Food for the Soul - March 2000
A Desert Cure for Perfectionism
Fr. Stephen Ernst, S.T.
continued

One sets up a "false god image," which, when violated, causes the person to beat themself or others because the false god image has not been satisfied. Life the rich young man, God can't be God, because the false god image, often defined as perfectionism, blocks the way! Those who suffer from this frequently act out of anger, guilt, shame, anxiety, fear, control and manipulation.

Many spiritual traditions have commented on this. In Christianity, the desert fathers and mothers recognized a cure through a discipline of the mind which is summarized in the 9 points below. A summary rarely does justice to the depth of a spirituality. An excellent book, Listen to the Desert, by Gregory Mayers, CSSR, Liguori/Triumph Press, might help.

The nine points are:

  1. Emotions are God-given gifts, never to be denied.
  2. When sensing a negative emotion, step back from it calmly, asking yourself what it tells you regarding the way you think about a situation, yourself, others of the way you act.
  3. Drop perfectionism, guilt from the past, anxiety about the future, control, self judgment, labels or unrealistic, useless expectations. Drop getting mired in the static of a feeling run amuck and calmly, attentively understand what the emotion is telling you.
  4. This is not easy and there will be failures; just be calm. When this discipline takes hold, one experiences consolation.
  5. Later, one experiences desolations. When, through the grace of Christ given by the Holy Spirit, you drop the static of self-judgment, you see with searing honesty your false god which hid you from your true God-given self! 
  6. One perceives pride, hate, greed, injustice and self righteousness and feels a healthy holy contrition based on judging a behavior, attitude or thought. This isn't self-judgment. It is like entering one side of a dark forbidding clump of woods on a path with little light. As you proceed, be calm, continue the discipline, walking through the pain of honest self understanding, toppling any false god, blocking you from your true self and God.
  7. You will come through the woods to the other side and exit free, happy and authentic, the real you God meant you to be. This "walk through the woods" is life-long.
  8. You may find yourself spending more time with God. You may speak honestly with surprising spontaneity. You will look at criticism, searching for truth, not excuses or revenge. You may flow with time in the present moment, loving life and others. You will see others differently, because you see yourself differently, with God eyes!
  9. You will be dangerous because, in your freedom, you will feel others' suffering and perceive the lies of the false god of the culture of death, the false god of religion without spirituality, politics without ethics, and economics without a conscience. 

You will pay a price being your true self grounded in God. This is Christ's cross, now yours! However, knowing you are known by God, the resurrection is perceived as an eternal mutual longing between you and the Triune God. This eternal longing is reality, a never-ending belonging, inviting you and all the friends of God to participate in true perfection, the community we call the Holy Trinity.

 

We would love to hear from you. If you would like to share your thoughts on this article or topic, please send an email to religious@stshrine.org

 

back to Food for the Soul archives listing